It's been three months since the last time I wrote and I'm pretty much in the same place I was then. I'm working 5 days a week at one job, 3 days at another, and trying to get a little "fun" money with the third. Working hard and trying to figure out how to enjoy life at the same time. I really don't want to look back and just remember this time as the time I worked my butt off all the time - not to say that there isn't something to be said for working hard and paying your dues before things supposedly get "easier."
I got another "no" last week. This one hurt. I had applied for Teach for America corps and had had the opportunity to get a phone interview....but still got a "no." I'm just so sick of that two letter word. Once I'm 100000000% fed up perhaps I'll get a three letter word instead, and no I don't mean "nay." I'm starting to try to reevaluate what I want next. Graduate school has been lingering ever since undergrad ended, so maybe that's the right next step (if there is one). Who knows.
Lately my biggest issue has been a huge lack of sleep, and it really has nothing to do with the hours of work. My sub-conscience, I think, may be trying to tell me something. The issue is that it's doing it via wickedly vivid dreams that cause restless sleep and wake me up between 2 and 4 every morning this week. Some of the dreams have been memorable, though I have forgotten most. The other night I dreamt that my ex showed up at my house and proposed...just like that. And it was as if my real-self was screaming at my dream-self to not be stupid. My dream-self said "no" to the ex at first but in the matter of probably 30 minutes said yes to the $67 ring. The receipt was on top of the ring. Classy? Yup. So strange. The other memorable one was a lot less exciting. I'm just hoping tonight I don't have any that wake me up. Dad suggested wine.
I am hopefully going to be writing some freelance for the weekly paper in Bangor that I wrote for last year. I will truly be happy to just be actively writing and getting my name out there.
My previous boss at said paper suggested sites such as Goodreads when it came to jobs. I cannot believe I hadn't discovered Goodreads before. It is such an amazing community of book lovers. I especially love the challenges within some of the groups. There is also a site wide challenge for users to pick the amount of books they'll read this year. I chose 25. We'll see how it goes. I just need something to make me feel like I'm using my brain. Between making sandwiches and repeating the same spiel I have for nearly 4 years...my brain is feeling a little neglected. Any reading suggestions are truly appreciated. I do hope to read some of the classics that I ignored through school - hello Odyssey and Iliad - we meet again.
Other than that...I've started to teach myself to knit - so far I have a medium sized blue rectangle. My grandmother taught me the basic stitch when I was pretty young and it was interesting to see how easily it came back to me. But my blue rectangle does have some holes in it. I've been trying to figure out the crazy world of finances. Saving money is not easy - but I'm desperately trying to form the habit. I really want at least $3000 in savings by December 31, 2012 - ya know if the world doesn't end. ;)
Until the next time I get the itch to write and vent - - xoxo, Jenn
